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Mar
3
F Leader , I Leader , Susan Hill

How Social Events Strengthen Your LIFE Group and Attract Guests

by Susan Hill

As a LIFE Group Leader, I am amazed at how effective social activities are for building relationships within the group. A few years back, the LIFE Group that had been meeting at my home on Wednesday nights moved to Sunday mornings on campus. I didn’t anticipate any changes in the group, but I was in for a rude awakening. Longtime group members who had spoken freely in my home were now virtually silent in the classroom on campus. As new members joined our group, longtime members shared less and less. As this trend continued, I was dumbfounded.
Despite the awkward transition, we started to plan social events outside of group. One Sunday, we had a picnic in the park. Another time, we attended a play at a local college. We got together and painted canvases on a Saturday afternoon. I immediately noticed that group members were talking and sharing more in social settings than they were during class. Slowly, relationships were building. This carried over to Sunday morning group time. My longtime members started speaking up on Sunday mornings like they had in my home group. Newcomers began sharing sooner than before. Before long, group members were getting together on their own during the week.
At Christmas, we decided to have our party at a local restaurant on a Saturday afternoon. I encouraged group members to invite people who weren’t connected to a LIFE Group. Honestly, I wasn’t overly optimistic that many newcomers would attend a Christmas party. To my surprise, six new people came to the party and three of them came to our LIFE Group the following Sunday morning.
This group transition taught me that social activities strengthen relationships in LIFE Groups and are evangelistic in nature. There are countless people who might not be willing to come to church but will gladly meet a group of friends at a local restaurant. After they meet new friends, they are far more willing to visit church.
As you consider ways to serve those you lead in your LIFE Group, don’t underestimate the value of getting together for social activities. People join a LIFE Group because they want to be a part of biblical community that extends outside group time. This describes the New Testament church that Paul describes in Acts 2:42, “And they devoted themselves to the apostles teaching and the fellowship, the breaking of bread and the prayers.”

Feb
9
F Leader , I Leader , Jay Fennell

Avoiding the Closed Group Syndrome

by Jay Fennell

Every small group or Sunday school class drifts toward becoming inwardly focused. Here’s how it plays out: a new group forms and enjoys early days of developing new relationships and connections with people. Everyone is equally eager to develop these relationships. The group grows numerically as new faces are added. Excitement builds as the group grows and reaches new people who were formerly unconnected.  This momentum lasts for a time but, after a while, it slows as the group leans more and more toward becoming closed in nature or less receptive to newcomers.
This trend toward becoming closed isn’t intentional, it’s accidental. It’s natural inertia. Relationships become solidified among group members as you do life together over time. Mountain and valley experiences of life are shared and bonds form as people walk side by side on life’s journey. And all of this is good. It’s what you must develop in a small group community. But the challenge is to not become so closed, so inwardly focused, that you forsake the importance of creating room for newcomers who desire to experience the same community you enjoy.
So how do you do that? How do you fight against the natural tilt toward an inwardly focused group? Consider these ideas:

  • Expect Guests. It sounds silly but it’s true. Inwardly focused groups do not expect guests and, therefore, do not have a plan to receive them, acknowledge them, and help them feel accepted.  When you don’t expect guests, you neglect guests.
  • Wear Nametags. You may know everyone’s name in your group, but guests don’t know any names typically. Wearing nametags sends the message that you expect someone who doesn’t know your name to be present.
  • Avoid Cliques. It’s so much easier to talk with people you know and already have a developed relationship with. But fight the urge to segregate yourself from others, especially guests, and take initiative to connect with newcomers. The worst possible scenario is for longtime members to chat with each other while not including guests.
  • Sit in Circles. Group size obviously dictates set up but, whenever possible, arrange your chairs in a circle. Circles promote group growth, unity and combined synergy.  This sends a positive message to guests who desire to belong and grow. Life change happens best in circles, not rows.